I have often felt crazy! Maybe different is a better word :). I know all the verbiage – you are unique, special etc. But unique and special has usually meant weird, crazy, different! When I was young I remember being told that I had such a unique voice!
Now even my way of communicating was weird! I didn’t know how to take it. Stop talking? How could I do that?
Well, I thought of a great plan. I had a small clock radio in my room that had a record option. It recorded right onto a tape – yep I am that old :). So I did what every puberty driven boy would do – I recorded myself talking! Oops – clearly a mistake! No one sounds good to their own ear:) I learned quickly that my voice was really unique – and I didn’t like it.
So now what? You can’t get rid of your voice! So I lived with it and tried not to think about it. It wasn’t till much later on in life that someone said ‘you sound like David Crowder’. I was like ‘what?’ I love that artist. He is my guy. I loved him because his sound, music and voice was unique :). You could tell that he loved what he did. His lyrics were stunning, his soul was in every song. It was honest and real – I loved it.
I realized that being different wasn’t bad. Being bad was bad. But being different and living out of who you actually are – is amazing! It is refreshing to have people that are their true selves.
You know those people that don’t care what people think about them in public – they just act how ever they want? I remember watching a social experiment online. There was a guy who went onto a bus (or train) and was watching a video with his head phones on. Then as he was watching he started to laugh out loud. His laugh was hardy, deep, real, fun! And with cameras spread throughout the bus – people started to smile, laugh, giggle etc. A guy not caring what people thought – enjoying life! It impacted everyone around him. I even caught myself laughing while watching. Infectious!
How often do we shy back because of fear, insecurity or shame? How often do we try to be someone that we think other people want us to be – instead of who we are? Why do people so often dislike who they are? Why do we see all the good things in others and all the bad things in ourselves? Why do we pretend to be someone we are not?
We hide our feelings, desires, insecurities, pain, past, truth, sin, longings….
We hide them believing that people are NOT going to love us for who we actually are. But the truth is – we are designed to be fully known so we can be fully loved!
Why do I share this all with you? Well, one of the most important parts of falling in love with God – is that he reveals these things to us when we sit with him, when we get quiet with Him. He reveals our hurts and pain; sin and desires… He reveals them because he wants to talk to us about them. He wants to renew them, redeem them, transform them – into God’s likeness.
When we focus on the things of the flesh – we live according to the flesh. (Hating my unique voice) When we focus on the things of the Spirit – we live according to the Spirit (loving the uniqueness because it is a voice that is remembered) Romans 8:5
God wants to do a redeeming work in us. Not just behaviour modification – change. He wants to teach us how to think, feel and act like him – to be ‘Christ-like’. God is love! He is filled with joy, peace, patience, kindness – always. It is who he is. And he wants to walk us towards that as well.
Flesh vs. God perspectives
Ex. 1 I hate that I am too small vs. Being small causes people not to be intimidated by me – this allows them to open up more quickly
Ex. 2. I am so gullible and I feel dumb vs. People don’t like telling jokes unless people are fooled by them and laugh. I am choosing to laugh 🙂
Ex. 3. I am not good at school like _______. Vs. School is a challenge but I really love people. I choose to work hard and love well.
Ask God to change your life from the inside out! This all starts with spending time with God and falling in love with him – He will take care of the rest.
Interesting challenge: nature is powerful for me. I really enjoy being in creation. Years ago I started to go for walks and then find a place in a park – and the I would lay down to listen! Listen to what? God :). His creation!
At first I heard nothing. But in time I learned to hear the effects of the wind on the trees, I heard crickets, acorns dropping from trees, insects, birds etc. When I allowed myself to enjoy this I was moved into wonder. Wondering with God about why he created certain things, what delights him about his creation, what did he want me to hear etc. I believe that God reveals himself to us through his creation (see Psalm 19:1-6).
Some time ago, I downloaded an album of different sounds of nature. I have found that in winter it is beautiful to help me to become quiet and still focused. It allows me to wonder and to worship. Perhaps this is something that will help you as you grow in your love relationship with the King of Kings.
Enjoy the day! Don’t forget to testify!!
Ps. Funny extra story. This week I was driving Ryker and his friend back to school after lunch. My phone is hooked up through Bluetooth to the vehicle. So when I get in – whatever I had last listened to starts playing. It was hilarious – up popped one of my nature songs – cows in a field all wearing cowbells! They were like ‘what is this?’ ‘Cows’ i replied :). I didn’t change the song. We listened to cowbells and cows for the whole ride – and we laughed. It was awesome!